Facebook is dangerous when you have PND. Everything on there seems to make you feel guilty or inadequate, from posts about activities people have done with theirs kids, the sharing of web links titled “25 nutritious toddler meals” (after I thought I’d done well finding the energy to make beans on toast), to simple things like smiling photos. I felt like I was this terrible mum, never doing enough, never being good enough.
The worst are memes though. The ones that talk about “cherishing every moment with your children, they won’t be small for ever”. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the sentiment, but these memes can be damaging. Why? Because firstly it’s impossible, and secondly because it stops us sharing our struggles with other people for fear of being judged for not loving our children enough. I have days when I’m bored out of my mind, days when I hate being at home with my kids, and days when the best part of the day is their nap time. And all this is normal, all this is part of life, and all this is OK.
So here are some moments I will not be cherishing:
- Nappy changes
- Sleepless nights
- Pushing a pushchair for hours with a screaming baby for them to then only sleep 20 minutes
- Early morning wake ups (4:30am and up for the day anyone?)
- Bolognaise and weetabix in the carpet
- Tantrums over triangle or square sandwiches
- The whining
and probably many others I’m too tired to think of!
So if you’re feeling guilty for not cherishing every moment, don’t. Just treasure the moments you do enjoy, even iif they are small.